Selfies

Selfies

There is something unnerving about our reliance on presenting ourselves to “the world” through the use of ‘selfies.’ It is as if our ability to capture an image of ourselves with the use of a phone’s camera indicates something about our inherent power as humans.

How many people are out there explaining to us that all we need to do is X, Y, and Z, and we will somehow achieve our dreams? Must our dreams be quantifiable to the masses? Must we curate ourselves for an audience that for the most part really does not truly care for our struggles at all, but rather the image of “perfection” we instead project?

Is anyone else exhausted from the hordes of individuals peddling their senseless ‘wares’ to the masses, as if they have the answers alone? Must we suffer through one more pointless podcast that we immediately forget when we put down our phones and return to our real lives?

Let me qualify the above statement, as not all podcasts are pointless. There are incredible podcasts out there, but there are also a plethora of podcasts that reinforce our brokenness as a society.

The term, power, does not merely connote an idea of strength; rather, it also speaks of our fragility. We are born, we grow, we live, and we die. This universe is so vast that the word itself is empty, as worlds within worlds spin inside our molecules, while something we name dark matter is thought to make up nearly one-third of the matter-energy composition of the universe.

Maybe ‘power’ can be reframed as a feeling of self. For instance, perhaps power is something we feel by ourselves in the woods on a hike at a moment in which we simply feel “okay” for a moment to be our fragile selves. Maybe power is an emotion we feel as we watch our kids grow up only to realize (later) we must let them go – literally and figuratively. Maybe power is recognizing that nothing we do matters in a universe that is so vast that it is still beginning 13.5 billion light years away. Maybe power is the recognition that everything matters.

When we stop our lives to take pictures and tell the world how strong we are at that very moment, it is a wonderful sentiment, but perhaps it is misguided. Perhaps the energy we spend investing in our idea of the world might be best spent embracing ourselves so we may literally and figuratively embrace others.

There is nothing necessarily wrong with ‘selfies’ at all. It could be viewed as an invitiation. I suppose the question here is what do we wish to project through the use of a ‘selfie?’ Are we projecting our very selves, or are we projecting a passing intepretation of what we think we might be? But for whom is this projection? Why?

Perhaps, a’selfie’ does not just refer to photography, but rather an intent to present parts of ourselves we feel comfortble sharing while omitting what we may consider ‘dark.’ What if we shared our darkness? What if we allowed others inside our brokenness?

A wise woman said to me recently that our brokenness is what makes us whole. As a man, I have always run away from my brokenness. Perhaps many of us run from it. Perhaps Smokey Robinson says it best in Tears of a Clown

 

The Money

The Money

Ever notice that many entrepreneurs in this age bracket often resort to citing their own financial wealth as proof that others should follow their inherent “power” and step into their own proverbial “greatness?”

Honestly, there is something strangely endearing about such folks. They mean well, do well and generally are fine people, but there is a disconnect. Invariably, these individuals are talented in way society tremendously values, and it probably does not hurt that these people are very charismatic and physically attractive, which are traits that work well in social media.

Where is the 300-pound obese woman with a high school education on social media? She is inherently sweet, cares about others, but really possesses no talent or skill that will get her beyond her current station in life. Her value equates to $12/hr at a local fast-food chain, and it is the best she can do and she makes do with the little she has to her name.

What can entrepreneurs say to this woman? Maybe she is kind, mostly selfless with a heart if not of gold, then made out of silver. She is a woman we will never get to know, because she is removed from sight, hidden, shy and unattractive.

Moreover, she is poor — and in a society addicted to numbers, we cannot get past what she lacks. As entrepreneurs cite their 6 and 7-figure incomes, such individuals like this hypothetical, yet real, woman become marginalized, fictionalized and ultimately forgotten.

Do we want to know the truth? Do we value character, moral fibers, empathy? Yes and no.

If yes, we may be near December when we watch the Hallmark Channel and cry at the mere hint of the corny love we witness, but desperately crave in our bones. Of course, this is a fallacy, too. Some people are mean for many reasons, but let’s pretend that is not the case.

If no, then it is the rest of the year when we enter the grind and celebrate the “been there, done that” philosophy that explains too much around us. By explaining to others that we have already been where they have been and done what they have done, we render their narrative meaningless. In these cases, let’s just stand in front of the mirror and tell ourselves the stories we want to hear.

What is life about? It is about the money, and it is about everything else we feel, think, hate, love, forget, and manipulate each and every day.

Hey entrepreneur. Take your 6 or 7-figure income and shove it.